Turning the Corner

Post 40
Weeks of training complete: 25 weeks, 4 days
Time remaining until Ironman: 6 weeks, 3 days

Miles swam: 109.962
Miles biked: 1,798.84
Miles run: 434.8

Goal: $5,000
Total raised: $2,440

Tonight, something happened. You hear a lot of athletes talk about digging deeper, about finding that special spot somewhere within them, when they need that extra push, when they're driving for the finish line; when the score is tied 17-17 in the overtime session of a playoff game, somewhere from deep within they are moved to excel. It is a move that defies the logic of bodily chemistry, of nutrition, of what should be humanly possible. I'm beginning to understand that.

Tonight, I dug deep. And I found something, a few things actually. And in the process, I believe, I've turned that final corner. As the annoucner in the Kentucky Derby would say: " ... and down the stretch they come!"

This week, obviously, has been one filled with challenges. Brody's sickness, high fever and constant painful moaning lasted four days and did not abate until yesterday evening (she is fine now); Heidi survived another round of layoffs (this time 40 percent of the coporate workforce). We were busy, tired, kept up the baby, fearful of our future and trying, trying to keep it all together – with work, with home, with life.

This time, I drew on my experience of all the other tough times we had had. Keep as positive as you can; keep as kind as you can, and whatever you do ... keep making the right decisions. This was my mantra - as my friend Eric would say.

So no matter what it took, I stuck to my workout. Tuesday, after all the kids were bed and the chores caught up, I biked and ran, finishing around 10 p.m.; Wednesday, I biked 22.5 miles in the trainer, sitting upright, rocking Brody back and forth in the stroller with my left arm; then swam late night at Tempe's Kiwanis Rec Center; today, I swam after work and ran from 8 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. It was during that run that I realized the reward of these decisions to do the right thing.

The clouds in my mind broke, and suddently I could see what this was all about, this Ironman: it's about elevating yourself to new levels; realizing that the limitations you perceive are mostly limitations set by you. It's about learning just how much potential we have.

My buddy Eric, who has completed one of these is much more sage in his advice. He's been through the roller coaster ride of the rookie. I imagine his journey this time is different than the first.

I've also decided to let go on the media cycle for a while. I'll pay attention, I don't do full blackouts, but worrying every day about what the Wall Street freak shows are going to do is counterproductive right now. These people are out of their minds and as the Dow continues to sink, it's become clear that the selling has nothing to do with the strength of the companies being sold anymore. Like I say, for how small traders are supposed to be, they sure behave in a herd mentality. Sanity will return, because at some point these fools will realize they sold too low. But that's neither here nor there. I cannot control the economy as a whole; only the economies of my family and my company within the current reality. So, I'll focus on that.

Thank you to all of you who wrote in the last couple days to offer support. It made a big difference.

Best,
Ed